Tuesday, 11 August 2009

Hell's closed...Rot in Heaven :P

Wish I did, but I take it..I could not have written something so thoughtfully hilarious.. So with my limited capacities, I could at best Copy-Paste this amusing Forward (Courtest: Santosh, a dear friend) for you guys.. It also does good to my sense of guilt for not Blogging (only Twittering all day) for a long time now. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

The following is an actual question [so say all Forwards] given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term exam. The answer by one student was too "profound" to miss out...

Q. Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it cannot leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1.. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2.. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa (a girlfriend of mine during my Freshman year) that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is Exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."


PS: The pic's one of my favorite and when I found it while searching for Heaven & Hell pics, couldn't resist using it although it doesn't suit the content perfectly.


Valerine said...

Wowie ths dude's theory is so damn cool! It must have freaked out the professor....And I think its worth being written about. :)

olive oyl said...

"Oh my god".
this is pure genius!

v said...

I think the student married Teresa and they now have grandkids who coincidently are studying chemistry at the University of Washington. That's how long ago I read this forward.

Ann Dee said...

@ Valerine

Much thought is put in some Forwards - I agree.

@ Olive Oyl

Could you guess who he might have grown up to be?

@ V

Oh I forgot to add..it was actually a Forward by a guy about his grandpa's ingenuity as a kid :P

vimmuuu said...

LOL, cant believe people actually think on those lines. It doesnt matter if the story is real or fake, but what makes me wonder is that people find time to write all these !

vimmuuu said...

Btw, Im blogrolling you ! :D

Stupidosaur said...

He's right. Go to

Search for all occurrence of 'freeze'. Or better read the whole article. Or even better read all the articles linked from this page. Or even better still, read the entire uncyclopedia.

You can do it in installments, reading to compensate when you do not get such forwards.

Word veri suggests I should have some cold 'lessi'. Or is it talking about something that Teresa wasn't?

Ann Dee said...

@ Vims

Forwards like this one amuse me -- some people can think so freakin out of the box :D One has to have some goodly creativity to make crap rock ya kuch bhi bolo...and he's even supporting it with such believable, logical evidences!

And thanks for blogrollin' ND at Vimmu's oh-so-famous Blog ;)

@ Stupidosaur

Boy whhattdiddya give me...I dropped off my chair laughing.. Will read it all bit by bit...

T-REX said...

Man..I owe a beer to this guy!

Zeba said...

haha. loves it

Stupidosaur said...

Yeah I did that too. Now I sit on the floor and read ;)

Stupidosaur said...

We wonder whether you are locked behind hell's closed doors or rotting in heaven these days :P

word veri:latersta

Science Bloggers Association said...

Nice Blog. Congrats.
-Zakir Ali ‘Rajnish’
{ Secretary-TSALIIM & SBAI }
[Editor- Children’s Poem & Adult’s Poem]

vatsal said...


T-REX said...

Hi! i updated

LAN said...

long time no blogs? :) :)

Jagat Jyoti Saikia said...

Just passed by to say hi... back to blogging after a sabbatical :)

Kiba natun likhisa neki?! Links diba

Hope life is treating ya well... Adios

Anita said...

hey!!! nice stuff!!! and btw...chnaged the colour of ma blog....and posted some new stuff....do drop by!!!!

Anita said...

hey!!! nice stuff!!! and btw...chnaged the colour of ma blog....and posted some new stuff....do drop by!!!!

Ann Dee said...

Friends...you guys are wonderful!! Thank you so much for remembering me.. My sabbatical is nearing the end... Catch up with you very soon.

Take care,


Spike said...